Draft ASS#1

Draft ASS-1 (Manisha Kapadia)

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2 thoughts on “Draft ASS#1

  1. Hi Manisha

    You have a comprehensive description of yourself however, there are a few “I”s that need capitalisation (throughout your whole report). Looking at your blog, you picked a great layout that’s simple (which makes your information easily obtainable). You might want to double check the link you provided to your Moodle description as it takes me to an error page. It looks like you have the “edit” URL rather than your public description.

    Looking at step 2, I feel that you could’ve been more concise with your second sentence. Maybe something like “Ruralco is a leading Australian agribusiness”, rather than exhausting the word agribusiness. Did you mean to say “farming equipment”, rather than “farm’s equipment”? Looking at your KCQs for Ruralco’s annual report, you used “anyway” in the wrong manner for your context it should be “is there any way”. A couple of unfinished words a bit further down “the”, “does” and “an” instead of “and”. You didn’t have to apostrophise “aim’s” as that means aim has ownership of “to be of good quality”, aims does suffice. A bit further down on your key challenges you have “fro” instead of from. Just double check that you can use “champion” in the context you have as I’m not so sure. All titles should be capitalised e.g. Chief Financial Office(r). You could’ve been more concise when you’re talking about the new CFO as you didn’t say which company the CEO began working for (Ruralco is implied). When you said “new general manager for people & culture who the group on 18 May 2015” I wasn’t sure what you meant by this? When you said “employees which are able to cope you with changes” did you mean to add the “you” in there? When you said “had an increasing trading pressures”, you can just get the “an” out of there to get your point across more concisely. Further down you have “allowed me to step out of my confront zone”, did you mean comfort? When you talk about Noni B I don’t really under what you mean when you say “how Noni B was in a lose reported in December, 2014 and then the lose was changed it positive results”? All in all, great read, you’ve already taught me the meaning of agribusiness and I look forward to following your progress and learning more about Ruralco.

    Your company’s financial statements spreadsheet looks good to me. I liked how you used Excel equations rather than simply inputting the raw numbers. My question to you is, in Excel, does dash mean the same as 0? Also, did your totals within statements of movements in equity add up to what they had in your company’s annual report? As mine didn’t.

    Looking at your step 4, you have a few grammatical and spelling errors such as forgetting to apostrophise certain words and leaving off the last letters of some words. However, that’s what drafts are for and it was an interesting read as I was able to relate with some of your insights.

    Regards
    Ryder

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    1. Hi Ryder,
      I will edit my report and fix the errors that you have pointed out to me regarding my grammar and spelling mistakes.
      Regarding your questions about step 3 you can have a look at my updated spreadsheet on my blog, it might answer your questions.
      When I was talking about Noni B and said “how Noni B was in a lose reported in December, 2014 and then the lose was changed it positive results” I meant that the company was in a lose. However, then was changed into positive results as Queenspark and Event brands had purchased to increase their online exposure. There is continuous profit shown by the company in 2016 as shown in the article by the Sydney Morning Herald on her blog. You can have a detail look about it in the link provided below to understand what I am saying by going through the articles on Noni B.
      https://suebee521.wordpress.com/2016/03/19/noni-b-in-the-news/
      Thank you so much for taking your time out and giving feedback to my ASS#1. I appreciate the comments you have giving me and will try my best to work on the things you had suggested to make my work better.
      Thanks,
      Manisha

      Like

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